I don't like you, and neither does Grandma. She told me that the next time she sees you she's going to give you a piece of her mind. She said that you've been walking around like you're the best thing since sliced bread — her words not mine, I'd say something a little more modern — and that you need to be put in your place. Grandma doesn't get around much these days, though. She's got to watch her television programs every day (she refuses to let me tape them for her and says she needs to watch them live so her friends don't spoil it), she's got bingo every Tuesday night, and she spends about three hours every morning doing her makeup and hair even though she just sits inside all day. But anyway because Grandma is so busy, and because I love her, I told her I'd pass on her special message: go fuck yourself. I put it on this vintage tee from the 90s, with marks and spots, so you can get the message wherever you are.